I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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