please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize