so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
