I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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