My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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