Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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