Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
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Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
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Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You ruined the universe
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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