I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
