Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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