That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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