i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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