I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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