help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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