would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
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