Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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