have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
