How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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