She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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