i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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