I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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