Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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