real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
