My nipple is on Facebook.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
