whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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