Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
