It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
