do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
You took a bar mat shot.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
i now understand why vodka
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize