So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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