Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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