Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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