careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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