He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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