Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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