i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
