I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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