Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
