if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Why are your pants in the freezer?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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