god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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