if you like me you must not know who I am
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
