Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
