I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
