so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
