Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize