I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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