no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
