he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize