did you get engaged???
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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