he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
