Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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