capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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